I've never understood how people can sleep at night and, during the day, count on the riches they will receive upon the death of a family member. That just doesn't seem right to me. I looked up the phrase "blood money" and, although it usually implies foul play, it also can refer to inherited money. Regardless, I think it's appropriate here since I have several family members tallying my grandparents' estate and anticipating their share. Now, I admit that, as human beings go, my grandparents are, well. . .human.

Nonetheless, they're my grandparents and I worry about them more often as time slips away. I worry about them not being around for the next Holiday season. I worry that my grandmother will fall and break her hip or my granfather will have a heart attack. Mostly, I worry that I don’t think I can get out to Arizona enough times to tell my grandparents I love them. I do not worry over how many used Volvos I can buy with my share of their estate.

My Aunt and Uncle are doing enough worrying over the estate for all of us. Recently, the hateful letters and e-mails have been flying which does nothing but upset my grandparents and make them feel like failed parents. All of this stems from the fact that my Mom has lived...er, shared domicile with her parents for the last ten years (since my half-sister was born). My aunt and uncle feel that my grandparents have been supporting her, but in all honesty, they support each other. When one is having a tough time, the other steps in and helps with bills and groceries.

And where do those two get off acting like some government agency dictating who and how much to charge people staying with my grandparents? Shouldn't that be up to them? If they were unhappy with the arrangement, surely they would have asked her to move out. And it's not like mine is one of those mothers who locks the poor elderly parents in a basement and feeds them table scraps. Quite the contrary.

So who is this arrangement really bad for? Well, apparently my Aunt and Uncle. Both agree that their share of the probate pie will be lessened since my horrible, mean, selfish mother has been "stealing" their inheritance.

My point behind all of this is that I think it's tragic that my aunt and uncle are so worried about what will happen to the blood money, they are hurting their aging parents and squandering the most precious thing that they could give my aunt and uncle: Love. And you can't get love from a frigid headstone.

Incidentally, I didn’t quite mean to start off my week with such a morbid tone, but this has been on my mind for a while and has really come to light in the last few days or so. I hope you enjoy my guest blog.

PK, that's horrible! I'm so sorry you have to deal with that. You'd think your aunt & uncle would be more concerned with spending time with their parents before they pass than how much money they'll get afterwards. Sad. :(

That's very sad... here's hoping that everything eventually calms down and works out...