June 08, 2009

Plans, Goals, and Projects

I turned 33 last Thursday.

That really put a few things into perspective. I've had goals for a lot of the milestone ages, and for the most part, I think those goals have gone unmet. Sometimes that has been good, like the goal of being married and having my first kid by the time I was 22. Wow, unrealistic much? My 33 year old self obviously knows better than my 17 year old self, who was the one to set that goal.

25's goal was to fit into the awesome green chinese silk skirt I found on super-mega-markdown at Macy's when I was 23. It was 4 sizes too small, but it was such a good price, and I was TOTALLY going to lose the weight and fit into it.

I'm 33, and that skirt hangs, still unworn, on the back of the 3rd bedroom door since I bought it. It's exempt from the "Haven't worn it in a year? Get rid of it." rule because it represents a goal. It stopped getting an age goal at 27. But someday.

The next number goals are coming up fast. I wanted to take ballet once I'd lost the weight, and wear a pair of toe shoes by the time I was 35. I also wanted to run a marathon by 35.

The toe shoe thing may never happen. I'm too old and didn't develop my feet properly when I was young. I'm okay with that. But the marathon... I can still do that.

I don't think, given how much weight I have to lose, that I can be at that point in less than two years. But i think I can do it in 3, so the new goal is that I will run a marathon at 35. If I don't make it, that'll be okay, but if I don't make it because I didn't try, well, that part ISN'T okay.

I've struggled with weight and eating for a really long time. I've lost and regained the same 35 pounds for years. I sometimes blog about weight related issues at my other blog, The Road to Half. You can find the link over in the sidebar.

I recently moved. I recently had a birthday. Two prime times to start over with a clean slate. So let's begin again. And speaking of begin again, I did a 365 project a couple of years ago, and so I decided that this year I'm going to do The Year of Lunch. Either it'll be awesome, or like Maggie Mason says, no one will care. But it'll keep me honest and maybe give me some insight on my food issues. You never know.