One of the recent posts on that blog to the left was about my weight loss struggle and lack of personal discipline. It is that lack of discipline that has made me fail over and over at stopping the compulsion to overeat. I like good food. I like sweets, and I like salty snacky things even more. The salty snacky things have not been terribly hard to cut down on. I've cut out potato chips and the like but will still eat the occasional (snack size) bag of sunchips or pretzels, that way I still get my salty fix sometimes. I pretty much cut out sugar, but lately I have been craving sweets, and have given in way more than I should. But the last few days I have been saying no and sticking to it. It hurts to say no, but once I've said it it feels good to stick to it. I had a piece of apple from Keegan's apple crisp the other day, but at least it was apple and not that sugar butter crumb stuff, or the caramel sauce. It was easy to turn down the cheesecake on Saturday because I don't really like it, even when people were raving over it. The chocolate cake on Sunday was harder. The bonbons last night were hard. The cookies today- really hard. But every time I say no it gets easier to say no the next time. It's hard, and it's really tempting to change my mind, but saying no ultimately feels better. I think I'm more reminding myself of that fact than telling whoever is reading this.

The upside though is that people are seeing that I am serious about it. Last night Charlotte offered me some Dibs (ice cream bonbons), and as soon as I said "thank you, no" she knew not to say "are you sure?", she took my no for no and left it at that. Then she was really cute, she looked at me and said "cover your ears" before saying "OH! These are SO GOOD!". I didn't cover my ears, but thought it was funny. A few months ago I insisted that if work was going to be put sweets out for general consumption that they stop putting them on my desk (my desk is the reception desk) That's like putting an alcoholic in a bar and saying "don't drink anything here". So today one of our clients baked my boss some cookies, and he offered me one. I said no, thank you. He said something about how good they were and I just repeated No. No. Thank you, but absolutely no. Here's to keeping it up.